Nautical Chef Gifts

Captain Hook's lesser known brother - Captain Spatula

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

'Isn't he supposed to sit on your shoulder Captain?'

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

Pirates double up as a scratching post.

'Yes, I do a lot of rowing. How could you tell?'

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

'It's not a desert island - it's Australia.'

Going to Sea.

It is my mother's, she uses it as an anchor for our yacht.

'That must be the 'Jolly Roger' they're always on about.'

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

Scuba diver in a fishmongers

'I heard that the new captain was raised on a farm.'

"Are there any extra crew on board? He still looks hungry."

The Imperfect Storm

The simultaneous development of dining and pomposity.

Distractions.

"Get those decks cleaned you swabs!..."

"I forget who, but he's somebody's kid."

"It's the Coast Guard - they want to know how many life-jackets we have onboard."

Fisherman has his dinghy punctured by a swordfish.

'Well, we still think you're a naughty boy, running away to sea like that!'

S. S. All You Can Eat

"Warning! Not to be used as a life saving device."

Great Moments in Culinary History.

Sea Rescue - rescuing animals from the arc.

"Yes, Ma'am, our fish is flown in fresh every day!"

White Whale Brand Grog

Sailor notices a sea mine in his foot bath.

"Must you always bring your work home?"

'You're always taking the fun out of everything!'

Rescue pump.