Nautical Adventurer Gifts

'Merle, do you think we sound stupid when we say 'aaargh'? I mean, it's not really a word, is it?'

"Warning! Not to be used as a life saving device."

'I'm a personal injury attorney. Have you ever been hurt on the job?'

'After paying for the boat, it's insurance, the docking and gas, I couldn't afford a trailer.'

Ship sinking while worker is still painting.

"You'd be amazed how quickly a boat like that pays for itself."

Pessimists saw a ship sinking. Optimists saw that they needn't worry about the Norovirus.

'Remember what bait you used.'

"They want us to set up a self-regulating body"

'I can't pretend I'm not a little disappointed.'

The End of the World

'Don't worry. I'm a church pastor. First little problem, and they'll find me.'

''We're getting too far from shore,' I say. 'Trust me, I'm a professional,' he says.'

'Dude. I'm gonna say this, one...more...time. I do not know how to make cheese.'

Bullship: Viking Bulls at Sea

Pirates double up as a scratching post.

'I should've known better thank to park my car anywhere near where you dock your boat.'

"Huh. In my memory he was a lot bigger."

"I removed the carpeting and lo and behold, hardwood!"

'It's Mooby Dick'

"The food situation is good, but I'm afraid we've run out of magnets."

"I told you to be careful!"

'Thank you for calling the Coast Guard help line. To sink, press one. To swim, press two…'

White Whale Brand Grog

"No, I'm Moby Fred, but I'll be glad to take a message."

Pirate eye chart.

Plunder Local.

'All I know is that she met him off Nantucket.'

"Get those decks cleaned you swabs!..."

'Does it have a remote control?'

"We made it more convenient so that you don't even have to walk now."

"Hey, you dropped this."

'Mr. Bosley and I will be busy all afternoon investigating offshore business opportunities.'

'Wow! It even has it's own Crows Nest complete with lookout!'

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'