Naughty Humor Gifts

'What do you mean 'What would nanny say'?'

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

'You gonna finish that lemon peel?'

May all your birthday wishes come true..

'Mom! -- Spot's skinny-dipping again!'

'How now, brown cow?'

"A nutcracker!! Hey...this thing looks used."

"A see through nighty? God who'd want to see you through that?"

'The next patient is allergic to cotton, silk, wool and synthetics.'

'My member requires some interest.'

'Oops, sorry!'

"Your calculations are right- it's our teabreak!"

"Possessing both sexes, the Hypoplectrus gutavarius mates with another Hypoplectrus gutavarius, each switching roles after each encounter."

Adult Magician

Introducing: Eye-Quit. The Nicotine Patch for Pirates...

"I said 'blow job' not 'blow chunks'."

"I've just had my panel 5 beaten...."

"Have you a cabernet that will pair well with dysfunction?"

Naughty-ometer.

Uniporn

"Do you remember what you had for lunch last Thursday?"

Kangaroo walking rabbit.

Emigrating birds wear face masks.

Vampire Selfies

'Wait, I've changed my mind. He hasn't been very good this year.'

'Firstly Madame, the Green Grocer is across the road and secondly that should explain why your 'bananas' are vibrating...!'

North Pole Adult Toy Testing Lab

'Candor is a plus.'

'Do I have a water pump? Sure! She's sitting over there!'

'A word of advice: Don't ever try to sting a pachyderm...'

Birthday Suit Alterations

Paper Beats Rock

"Can you stop laughing? I've never seen anybody snorting woodchips through their nose before..."