Narcissism Novice Gifts

I like my company portrait. Did they use any Photoshop?

Modern Narcissism

"I'm treating you like a living deity for one day."

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

"I love it when you quote my blog back to me."

"Oh come now, Mr And Mrs narcissus, Have you two been fighting again?"

Selfie Man

Poser

"Do you know what your problem is, Duane? You're too full of yourself!"

"If you think you've earned this by consistently retweeting my tweets -- you're right."

'You may well, Ms. Ferris, one day write a 'Fifty Shades of Grey' bonkbuster, but today your account is one shade of red.'

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

Narcissus

'Welcome to Narcissists Anonymous. Now before we get started let's talk about me for awhile.'

Selfie-Conscious

I really hope the agent likes my submission... - '' - 'This is perfect.' - '' - 'Absolutley perfect.'

'Egomania, you say? How on earth did you diagnose me so quickly?'

The casual selfie

"I'm awesome!!"

Adam: The magazine by Adam, about Adam!

Pre-selfie, Selfie, Post-selfie.

Instagramaphone

"It's all me, me, me, with you - it's like the world revolves around YOU all the time!"

"If you have a boyfriend, I have some advice, young lady! Wisdom that's been handed down from generation to generation!"

"However, everything else but time and tide waits for me!"

'But enough about me. . . tell me about yourself.'

'Isn't that Narcissus over there?' - 'Here's lookin' at me, kid!'

"The doctor says I'm taking too many selfies."

"He's an awesome leader . . . just ask him."

I want nobody to see me doing this. . . Yet I want everyone to see this.

"Stop bleating, it's all ewe,ewe,ewe!"