Mystical Golfers Gifts

Golfing Fakir.

'He lived and died for golf.'

'If you can't control your temper,sister,you shouldn't be playing this game!'

Gopher underground hit by golf tee.

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

Golfing with God.

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

"Swallow the ball and stick the club up your a**e."

His golfing career in a long tailspin, PGA pro Andy Pemrick spent his later years as the pro at Happy Time Mini-Putt.

"Out bending spoons at Pop's diner."

Thanks God!

Golf Crime Scene.

'I see you reaching into your wallet for a twenty dollar bill.'

Red Indian carrying a baby in golf bag.

"You will be going on a long walk."

'Do you mind if I play through?'

'On Tuesdays, I bowl.'

"On the sixteenth hole? I can sympathize with you, but I can't let you go back and finish the round!"

Golfer on Ski Lift.

Good and Evil: The Human Video Game

"I see a gullible stranger being fleeced of his hard-earned by a shameless charlatan."

'Gloria, tell my nine-o'clock to go to hell.'

Practical Yolkers.

'You won't need those up here. He can't stand golf.'

'Clairvoyant' 'Closed due to unforeseen circumstances'

A ball's best case scenario.

Golfer putting into whale's blowhole.

Spaceman playing golf on the moon

"Forget that ball caddie, there's another just like it up here that I can tap in...."

"Slicey, Trappy, Bogey, Toppy, Mulligan, Hooky, Threeputty

'Sail powered buggies, that's the future.'

"It's not that I'm unappreciative, but I wouldn't mind holing in two occationally."

"I'm getting ready to have my fortune read to see my future, but first I want to make sure I can see clearly."

'I said we were going to play a game of skins, not shirts and skins!'

Meditating on a 4th for golf!