Mystic Shopper T-Shirts

Aura Ashley - Mediumwear.

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"I shop, therefore I am."

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

Jungle Stores.

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

Unfinished Funiture Store.

"Did you have a cat?"

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

Unusual Offers

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

"Extra large sanitary pads and extra small ones, pads for the night..."

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

'Triple-headed razors?... Aisle seven.'

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

'Please enter your pin now.'

SERMONS 'R' US - everything for the clergy.

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

Jumble Sale

"Does it come with magnets?"

'I'm home, Honey! Come see what I picked up at the Farmers Market!'

'Gee, these are great, are they dishwasher proof?'

'Can we move the beef jerky a smidge and display our organic cleanser?'

Pet shop with recipes stand outside.

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

Clown in supermarket looking at a tin of Canned Laughter.

'You've got a degree in mathematics? Well, the economy isn't logical. It's about irrationality, superstition, gossip and pure luck. You need a degree in gambling and black magic.'

'Look, we have 7 and we have 5 . . . I make that 75 �' the number of your house!'

Shoppers of Mystery.