Mystic Humor Lover Gifts

The seventh sense

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

The worm that churned!

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...

Roy, if you can hear me, the Mets are twenty games over .500 and they have a good shot at clinching the N. L. East."

"I've worked as a wet-nurse for ten years, but I'm after something new now..."

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

Cat Seance

"I was kicked out from another kid's bed. Do you mind if I crash under yours for awhile?"

They say animals have the sixth sense and the talent to look into the future...

'You see me coming here every week and paying you fifty dollars...'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

"Look! A sushi bar!"

Guru levitates while wife vacuums.

Banana

'I'VE GOT EYE CANDY!'

"Excuse me, but I'm the only one who opens cans around here!"

'My biological clock finally went off.'

'You will go 3 for 5 tomorrow.'

"Charlie's really interested in co-operative housing..."

"Must go now Zelda. The builders have just arrived"

'I propose a day of mild exasperation in response to Richard Dawkins.'

"All I'm saying is, why do we always have to sit on just one side of the table, all bunched up?"

'C'mon, let's get married! Just imagine - our kids could fly over the moon!'

Man asking lady if she cares for him

"Vous voyez quoi pour l'avenir de l'humanité?"

'According to your love line, I should be calling a cop right now!'

'Got any old teeth for putting under pillows?'

"I can't read anything right now. We have to wait a bit: Your palm is all wrinkled..."

'I should warn you - he's quite a badly damaged individual.'

Exam Questions Foretold

Fortune Teller looks aghast at what she shes in her crystal ball.