Mystery Dining Enthusiast T-Shirts

Hand coming out of chandelier pulls cover off waiter's food.

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'How is the water prepared?'

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

Executive Tacos

'We don't bring you anything. That's the surprise part.'

Our Troubled Chowders

'Shall I bring two children's meals, or will Madam regurgitate her own?'

Suddenly Harold froze, trying to remember if he had ordered a side of roaches, or if this was a gross violation of public healthcare policy.

'Who ordered the chef's head?'

Salad Hat

"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."

Deep in the heart of the one-star restaurant district...'Guess what you're eating buffet!'

'I'll have the mystery meat with anonymous vegetables.'

"You want fries with that Chardonnay?"

All our meals digest easily forming a soft, mushy stool with just a hint of acridity.

"She always said she'd only share this recipe over her dead body."

I recommend the ketchup.

"Have you folks eaten here before, or shall I explain the concept?"

"My name's Aldred and I'll be your server this evening."

CIA Cafeteria: 'It's nice of you to ask, but the recipe is classified.'

Today's special: Roadkill stew.

Customer admires courtyard of bagel shaped restaurant.

'Food critics cannot determine what are crime scenes.'

"Mmm. The soup du jour is not cream of mushroom. It is not tomato or celery, it is not chicken, nor is it Scotch broth. It is most definitely not won ton..."

"We keep getting billed from DoorDash. Who here has been ordering all this food?"

'I can't believe you cooked this all by yourself...you must have had an accomplice!'

'Surprise us.'

'I'll take a six-piece 'Surprise Me' meal, and two 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Wraps with Super Enigma Chunks...'

Fresh Fish Restaurants

Social distance in restaurants

An eerie hush fell over the audience when Myrtle responded, 'it tastes likes chicken. . .'.

Tall man has a tall menu, whilst a small woman has a small menu.