Mystery Meal Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Arkansas stew."

'I'll take a six-piece 'Surprise Me' meal, and two 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Wraps with Super Enigma Chunks...'

An eerie hush fell over the audience when Myrtle responded, 'it tastes likes chicken. . .'.

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

'How is the water prepared?'

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

The Aisle

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

"Just remember...the main ingredient in all my dishes is love."

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

"Sure we could just print out the specials, but the chef doesn't want to leave a paper trail."

Hand coming out of chandelier pulls cover off waiter's food.

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

'I'll have the mystery meat with anonymous vegetables.'

Clandestine Cuisine

"She always said she'd only share this recipe over her dead body."

CIA Cafeteria: 'It's nice of you to ask, but the recipe is classified.'

'I can't tell you what's in the stew because it's classified.'

Waiter, there's a wireless earbud phone in my soup.

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

'Food critics cannot determine what are crime scenes.'

GMO apple

Waiter: 'Your Chicken wings Ma'am.'

"Mmm. The soup du jour is not cream of mushroom. It is not tomato or celery, it is not chicken, nor is it Scotch broth. It is most definitely not won ton..."

"Surprise me."

'My doctor said I'm digging my own grave with a spoon and fork. It'll take longer if I use only a fork.'

Faith-Based Tuna Casserole

'I can't believe you cooked this all by yourself...you must have had an accomplice!'

'Surprise us.'

"We keep getting billed from DoorDash. Who here has been ordering all this food?"

This time, Eddie was going to pay for this.