Mustard Enthusiast Gifts

'Smooth Mustard' and 'Coarse mustard'

Close encounters of the Grey Poupon kind.

'We were all out of white wine - so I took the liberty of squeezing out a glass from the Dijon mustard.'

'Your ball park mustard, Sir.'

"Alle Baba! Throw me the Grey Poupon!"

Dijon Vu

"She can't be that mad. She used my favorite mustard."

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

Emergency Hipster Beard

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

A family with mustaches talking on their cellphones.

"Face it, Clive - you're bald."

"Incredible! Once again, you've made the perfect piece of toast."

"Actually, I think you looked better WITH a beard."

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

Bearded Leftie.

"I noticed a few browns."

Peak Beard/High Peak Beard

Classic Emojis for sale.

"Are you growing that mustache to make me break up with you?"

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

Street Organ - Monkey

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

The Organic

"If I put mustaches on all of us, we look more like a team."

"And where do you see your mustache in five years?"

'It's a chinstache. They were popular in the 1800's, but now they're coming back.'

"I've made a terrible mistake."

Chuck played mean hair guitar.

"It's not a moustache kiddo: It's nasal hair..."

Two men in barber shop

Beard fails