Mushroom Mystery Fan T-Shirts

'Are these mushrooms or toadstools? And why are you holding a stomach pump?.'

He looks so natural lying there...

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

'I've no time for these foragers - they come into the area and snap up all the best houses...'

"Play 'Misty' for me."

'Waiter, there's a Fly-Agaric in my soup.'

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

'Ah, now's there's something different....'

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

Dog detectives

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

'This species of fungi was last spotted in Oxford by Alice Liddell in 1862!'

"Curiosity."

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

'He's been shot!'

Gene Manipulation

"Another clear case of COVID19."

"You might call it shoplifting officer, but I prefer to think of it as foraging."

'Are these mushrooms edible?'

Fresh off the boat and dazed by the tropical sun, Bert falls prey to the sales-rep devouring Giant Mushroom of Indonesia.

"I just realized what our problem is - we're fungible."

Goblin.

Mushrooms of New York

The big break in the case of the missing French Fries: 'But just to make sure, can you have each of them squawk.'

'Don Francesco, scusi... But while we were burying Luigi, some joggers ran into us... So we had to bury five corpses altogether...'

'The paintings are neolithic, I suspect the Mustaches wee added by a later people.'

"Hunters turned philosophers"

Police are searching for a male between 16 and 25 years, with a silky sheer taupe complexion and a run over his left eye.

'That's right, the Princess kissed me by mistake: She didn't know the difference between a frog and a toad...'

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'