Muddy Mischievous Gifts

"If you want soil moved around, I say why wait for erosion."

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

Meowlzebub

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

'Yoy know perfectly well WHICH corner, Jamie!'

Misery lit...

Law Books

Children playing in a library

Gracie hatches a plan to trap Santa.

Killing Santa

'Looks like a chipmonk.'

How to avoid a heart attack.

'It's finished, my masterpiece - wait...'

'Cut it out!'

Leaving pet shop, boy says to puppy: 'You're my bitch now.'

Watch for Children.

"When I run away, put my picture on t-shirts instead of milk cartons."

'Good morning, Vicar - are you decent?'

"He really likes to play with the mice before he kills them"

'We bought it as a bonsai tree!'

'Nothing but veggies...we gotta learn to read.'

'Believe me -- you don't want to know what I did on my summer vacation.'

"What have you done with her this time?"

Children using thier aunt's round hat as a target

'You'll pay for this.'

Cat burglar.

'My trust fund manager makes me wear it.'

'Just think of it as graphic design, Mom.'

Spiro & Pusho on the minefield

'A large hole has appeared in the wall of the nudist camp - Police are looking into it.'