Movie Purist Gifts

"He's been upset since they colorized 'It's a Wonderful Life,' and I think it's finally pushed Him over the edge!"

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

Herman Mankiewicz

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"You funnin' me, bub?"

"Stick Figure" "Stick Figure II" "Stick Figures" "Stick Figure: The Reawakening"

Did you ever get that feeling in the moonlight?

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

"Spoiler alert."

"Why don't you just go and see this summer's feel-good movie?"

'No, when something blows up it doesn't buffer, that's just special effects.'

'Harlow, why can't you be passionate like Mel Gibson?'

Hollywood Breakup

'What do you mean, 'pass the remote control'?... We're at the cinema!'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

"And make sure you get my daughter home before sunrise..!"

'One chatterbox, a natter natter and two shhhhh's please.'

'It's a 'Free Willy From Hollywood' petition: Would you please sign it...'