Film Enthusiast Gifts

"OK, we need the body double for the eating scene."

A man exits his house to a clapboard.

'I can't find the words to express my anger with you.' - 'She needs a dictionary.'

'I'm sorry, Ralph, but you didn't make the final cut.'

"I like subtitles. I can watch the movie, skip the book, and not feel guilty."

"But I've already paid for four weddings and a funeral"

"No movie deal yet, but Kinko's extremely interested in the idea of making multiple copies of your screenplay."

Titanic 100th anniversary

'Critics are calling it 'one of the films opening on Friday.''

Directing Cows

'I do hate it when they squeeze the end credits like this!'

'The best part is when the band starts playing again.'

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

Casting Director

The village cinema-club was going down a treat with the locals!

Sweeney Todd.

'I don't mind playing dead. But what I would really like to do is direct.'

'We're slanting our movies for audiences in China, so your script needs some rickshaw-chase scenes.'

'Not another war film.'

'No, the nude scene isn't essential to the plot, but we need it for the posters.'

Prices displayed for a book and its movie rights.

I visited the Commons...I've already seen Where the Wild Things Are!

Keeping the projector cool

"Now let's run through it once more, Mr. Harkness, and this time try not to shut your eyes when you pull the trigger."

Action Film Shushing

"Not another movie about straight people in love. I'm sick of extrapolating."

"Spoiler alert."

"No offense, Lou, but you're a money guy, not a movie guy."

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

"He's Richard Gere without the principles."

"I've been stalking actors, but eventually I'd like to stalk a director."

"Just finishing the roll?"

"Is there no escape from escapism?"

"To be on the safe side, let's just say 'noonish.'"

"Loved the movie. Hated the audience."