Cinematic Enthusiast Gifts

Chairs read 'Director (movie)' and 'Director (sycophantic DVD extras)'.

"I think your Arabic is coming along fine for your trip to Casablanca, with or without the Humphrey Bogart impression."

"I don't need the glasses, I had 3D laser eye surgery."

Ennio Morricone

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

Herman Mankiewicz

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

'This should be perfect. The main characters fall in love during a series of explosions.'

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

Job Vacancy: Human cannonball. Applicants must of the right calibre

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Steve McQueen

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

Canadian film production

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

Moby Dick

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

'Have you been waiting long?'