Cinematic Enthusiast Gifts

Chairs read 'Director (movie)' and 'Director (sycophantic DVD extras)'.

Memory Content is King

"I think your Arabic is coming along fine for your trip to Casablanca, with or without the Humphrey Bogart impression."

Mega Cinema. Sorry I'm late, but it was such a terrible movie I had to watch it twice just to get my money's worth.

"I don't need the glasses, I had 3D laser eye surgery."

Ennio Morricone

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

Herman Mankiewicz

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

'This should be perfect. The main characters fall in love during a series of explosions.'

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

Job Vacancy: Human cannonball. Applicants must of the right calibre

Getting to Know You

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

Steve McQueen

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

Canadian film production

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."