Mountain Climber With Flair T-Shirts

'I know it's cold up here, but you can't attain enlightenment wearing a hat like THAT.'

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Stairlift around cliff face.

"Since global warming the Abominable Snowman is much less frightening than he used to be."

They've been inseparable since the avalanche.

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

"WOW, we're on top of the world!"

'I'll clobber the first joker who ask me if I enjoyed my 'Winter Break'!'

The Path

'GESUNDHEIT!!'

“Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!?”

Recalculating

Bad times to sneeze

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

'What do you mean you 'forgot' the camera?!'

"You'll be fine. Just don't look down."

"I like to stay on top of things."

"Well, it gets lonely up here!"

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

Danger: Falling animals

"I've learned one thing: when an avalanche begins, get into the cave."

''Because It's There' got us up here...you have any ideas how we get back down?'

'Let me remind you that any advice you receive is protected by copyright and I retain all rights therein.'

Survival kit

'So what if we don't have running water?!'

'Yes, Super-Supreme pizza... Delivered please...'

In 1682 in a remote cave in the Ural Mountains, Heinrick Glaston discovers irony.

'We were hoping You'd just say 'Be fruitful and multiply' again.'

"I'm using the ground as a safeguard against plummeting."

'Look! We have ants all the way up here.'

"This means that dad is climbing Everest with my cheese and pickle sandwich."

'Nothing can stop us now, Fred...'

The secret to happiness is knowing how to keep a secret.

'Because it's there.' ... 'Because he may fall.'