Mould Maniac Gifts

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

So you're a mocking bird...

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

'Hey, wait a minute...Apples aren't indigenous to this geopraphical region.'

'Spell checker!'

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

Three Ladies

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

A skip full of fools.

"Sheesh... Missed a button again."

'Is "I'll huff and I'll puff till I blow your castle down" the best intimidation we can come up with!!'

'Relax Cookie. I'll call the mold monster experts!'

A consumer guide to cheese.

Funny Farm

'Todd don't be such a clown...'

Butterfly Sales

'C'mon! Visit me on the web!'

'Are these mushrooms edible?'

King Richard I

"Yes, I'm the Cowardly Lion, and I want a double shot of single malt courage for the Yellow Brick Road."

'I know it looks big, but it'll shrink when I wash it.'

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

"Why can't you bring me a rodent like a normal cat?"

'This one is for not making a pre-emptive strike against anyone questioning our authority to make pre-emptive strikes.'

'Oh, you know, the usual...just working.'

"Was it hard becoming a clown?"

The mushroom pickers

"An ark with a 'K', you idiot!"

Tonight's Lecture: Earth's Biodiversity at Risk. Obviously, they've never looked inside my refrigerator.

I Told You To Compost It!

Dragon Barbecue

Mammoth hoover