Motivational Banter Pillows

'Because I CAN'T follow my dreams, dummy!'

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

Hanging off every word...

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

"The Gross National Product and the Gross Domestic Product are doing okay. It's the Gross Domestic Mojo that's going down the toilet."

'I said I wanted to address the manager shortage -- not a short manager!'

'You need to ask yourself, Am I a pecan or a pecan't?'

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

'Is that the smell of fear? Or is it just Meatloaf Monday in the cafeteria?'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

'Even in the mundane tasks, aim for perfection!'

You said you wanted to speak to the chairman of Zapco Steel - I've just realised that's me.

Manager - I don't just manage, I excel!

'When I say jump, Hayes, I don't want you to just ask 'How high?' ... I want you to show me!'

Great training inspires employees: 'I see myself doing you job before too long...'

"Don't compare yourself kid. I may be a hotshot lawyer but it took me eight lives to get here."

"Oh Gregori! You tell such funny stories!"

"If he didn't live each day like it was his last, he would have lived another 40 years."

"Jane is sales, Fred is accounting, and Johnny's song and dance."

'If he applies himself, there's no limit to what he won't be able to accomplish.'

"The thing is, you have to really want to change."

"I love this work-from-home concept. Now I can fire someone without going to the office."

'I don't offer any free advice anymore. I am offering a self-help seminar and a motivational coaching program online.'

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

"You can do it!"

"Ambitions. . . To . . . Er. . . Um . . . Become. . . Er. . . Um. . . A. . . Er. . . Um . . . Motivational. . . Er. . . Um. . . Speaker."

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'