Motherhood Magic Gifts

'The old lady who lived in a shoe had so many Mother's Day cards she didn't know what to do.'

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Your mother called to remind you to diversify."

'She finds it really easy to juggle her kids with her career now she's joined the circus.'

Doris K. Elston: Brain Surgeon, Professional Model, Artist, Lawyer....Plus Mother of Four.

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

Fertility goddess. Nanny goddess.

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

Mother Nature

"He's such a fussy eater."

"Sorry Tina, I won't be able to come over: Joey is finally asleep and I don't dare move..."

Downloading Pregnancy

"I actually had this haircut before I became a mom."

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

Mighty Man Of Justice Is Born

I love my family!

Men explained.

"I guess for me family planning is just a study in fertility."

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

"I said, was... it... a... difficult... birth?"

Mother's Love

Mum and the Sleepless Baby

"On no, the baby's breach!!"

The Yummiest Mummy in the Village

'They sure have small litters.'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

'The dripping keeps me awake!'

'The cool thing about being a kangaroo is that I can actually watch my baby grow...'

'I think babies grow in a mommy's tummy and adopted babies grow in a mommy's heart.'

Maternity Ward