Monster Stories Gifts

'May I ask what it's in connection with?'

"Holy cow, Kenny, look at the size of that thing! It's huge, I tell ya'! And the teeth! The teeth!"

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

Zombie standup

Love at First Sight

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster have some fun with the tourists...

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

Dead Funny

Out To Lurch

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

Night of the Zombonies.

Godzillla eating people using telephone poles as chopsticks.

"I thought they were cracking down on jaywalking."

The Loch Ness Rowing Team

"I don't know what else we can do. He won't look up from the screen!"

"Technically he's a zombie but we'll market him as a hybrid."

Boy and Bear and Monster

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"I'll be a little late. I'm working a double shift."

Zombies.

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

"I don't care what you thought you saw,l there are no such things as people"

Doctor Frankenstein creates a new monster that makes the mob even more blood thirsty. Colour

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

"This makes Pamplona seem like child's play."

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

Myths and legends...

'Harvey, did you notice what a beautiful full moon we have tonight?'

'Rock.' - 'Paper.' - 'Boris.'

"Allow me to introduce Recession. Recession is here to stay."

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."