Money Morality Maven T-Shirts

"I'll invest, but you must promise none of my money will go towards that Robert Mugabe."

Great Chinese Dynasties

'You're close, Spencer, but usually a business plan is a little more involved!'

"Cash, Jordan. That's what separates man from the apes."

'Don't worry about it. If at first we don't succeed, we can do it later and get paid time-and-a-half for it.'

"Remember, money is only a tool - to make more money."

"I'm teaching him to rollover my 401 (k)."

Warning that Inflationary Policies Could Lead to Crash on Wall St

'The Fed decided today not to raise or lower interest rates, but instead just moved them sideways a little.'

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

US dollar perched on fragile house of cards.

'Mixed news from the federal reserve...interest rates will drop on savings but will go up on loans.'

'Better brace yourself. It looks as though your broker's now equipping your monthly statement with crumple zones.'

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

"If I'm such a poor risk, how did I get so deep into debt?"

First Church of the Almighty Dollar.

"I don't have time for piggy banks. Can't I just buy an ATM?"

Wow thanks, a cheque for $500M made out to 'small business'.

Businessman has Sterling Sign Shaved in Head.

'I'm afraid the stock price gods are not happy Ralph.'

Investments.

"I've found that when money starts talking, you can't shut 'er up!"

The Euro.

"New money, Bobby, is old money that got away."

A wiser and a better man

'I think it's time to reboot your fiscal compass.'

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

'Not only can I not find the middle class tax cut, I can't find the middle class.'

'We're able to cut back on legal fees by being more ethical.'

'The good news is, you have money up the wazoo. The bad news is, you're constipated.'

'And, lastly, I'd like to thank Chuck for his years of service. He'll be leaving the company next month to spend more time with his cash and cash equivalents.'

'I'm being denied access to the Warren Buffett within me.'