Money Matters Master Gifts

"What you need to triumph in politics is a lot of contacts and not a lot of scruples."

Watering Money

'Money isn't making you happy? Okay, I'll raise my rate, and we'll see how that works for you.'

'Daddy is going off to stimulate the economy by making gobs of money.'

"At the end of the day Simon, money talks!"

Economic Prosperity

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

"I'm not sure if that bill is correct or not, sir. We just throw a bunch of charges on there to see which ones stick."

'I'm only a millionaires, and there are over 260 billionaires!'

Scott Walker keeps his job.

'Pep's finance' man confused and scared of 'Real estate', 'Gold' etc

"Although the collection plate appears to be half full, our accountant assures me that it is half empty."

'Whoever said 'We have nothing to fear but fear itself' ought to have a look at my credit card bill.'

Business news - 'Interest rates will remain unchanged...but the number of zeroes in $1,000,000 will be reduced from 6 to 5...'

"Experts agree - we need a tax increase."

"We can't go on meeting like this, I'm practically broke."

Imagine the mess the world woudl be in if we didn't have the best executives money can buy running it.

Energy Bills

The Recession Hole.

"You're my ideal client. A man with a LOT of money, in a LOT of trouble."

Oooo, Mr. Private Sector, whoop-dee-doo. It's not like we don't come from the same printer.

EU-budget fight

"Just once, I'd like to be able to write a check without getting thrown in jail."

"I heard you are charging a monthly fee for using your debit card, and I'm here to complain!"

"What do you mean, 'money isn't everything'?

Plimbco Bank & Trust, old money division.

'Behind the Eight Ball'

'I had to co-pay for the bagel.'

Gentleman wanting to know exactly how much he owes his butler

"Ask Mister Buck." Our wizard of finance answers your questions. "Mist Buck, what's a 'lump sum settlement'?" That's what you get from workers' comp if you get hit on the head at work.

'You can't win — every time we earn a little overtime, it gets eaten up by inflation!'

'Wow! You weren't exaggerating when you said your company had a high cash burn rate!'

Self Service Loan

'The 22% tax I understand, but who gets the other 78%?'

The Inflation of the Dollar.