Money Matters Buff Gifts

'Yes, we offer no-fee checking accounts. For a small fee.'

Dicorce lawyer: 'I can't promise you custody of your money. But I'll make darn sure you get full visitation rights!'

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

Watering Money

'Money isn't making you happy? Okay, I'll raise my rate, and we'll see how that works for you.'

'Mr Sims, in honor of your portfolio, we're flying our flag at half-mast.'

Making The World A Better Place for Giant Multinational Corporations

Federal Guidelines

Economic Prosperity

"I'm not sure if that bill is correct or not, sir. We just throw a bunch of charges on there to see which ones stick."

'I'm only a millionaires, and there are over 260 billionaires!'

Scott Walker keeps his job.

A gargoyle holds up sign saying 'I have critical market info'

"Although the collection plate appears to be half full, our accountant assures me that it is half empty."

'Whoever said 'We have nothing to fear but fear itself' ought to have a look at my credit card bill.'

'He's a major client.'

"Experts agree - we need a tax increase."

"We can't go on meeting like this, I'm practically broke."

Oooo, Mr. Private Sector, whoop-dee-doo. It's not like we don't come from the same printer.

'Think about it: There were over three million of us co-owning this ant-hill, so we only got a few cents each...'

The Recession Hole.

"You're my ideal client. A man with a LOT of money, in a LOT of trouble."

EU-budget fight

"What do you mean, 'money isn't everything'?

'Would our taxes be any cheaper if we lived in a sketcher?'

"I heard you are charging a monthly fee for using your debit card, and I'm here to complain!"

'In life I was scorned for worshipping the Almighty Dollar.'

'Behind the Eight Ball'

'You can't win — every time we earn a little overtime, it gets eaten up by inflation!'

Plimbco Bank & Trust, old money division.

'I had to co-pay for the bagel.'

Gentleman wanting to know exactly how much he owes his butler

"Before we came along, gentlemen, all this was nothing but farmland."

'Wow! You weren't exaggerating when you said your company had a high cash burn rate!'

Self Service Loan