Monastery Life Lover Gifts

"Straighten up that tonsure."

Trappist Monk Discord

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

Quills - Sizes 1-9

'Exams were harder before the Renaissance.'

Trappist talk show.

'Am I glad to be back - austerity's gone mad out there!'

Amimated illuminated Manuscript

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

Firemen trying to rescue a monk from a burning monastery

'What is wrong with brother Sebastian?'

Fresh Pears / Ripe Plums / Juicy Gossip

"For simplicity, we call this one Ding and that one Dong."

Two friars ringing bells

Everyone knew it was a hideous style, but nothing was ever said.

Rin Tin Zen.

"You've got a vow of silence? How interesting! Tell me all about that!"

'Oh no, the Gradwells are here with their homemade wine!'

You're supposed to just copy it. The Archbishop says to knock off the ad libs!

"The Convent of the Immaculate Heart Brewery"

Hillbilly.

'Hey! That's new - paternity leave!'

You realize this means 6 more weeks of lent.

'Answer me! It's your mother! Don't give me that vow of silence!'

Brother Kevin is wrecking the dorm!

Cistercian 2000

Chipmonks.

Somewhere in France Melanie Anne is blinded by the joie de vivre.

'It's a bill for the firewood. Dang, we're still living beyond our means.'

Office Parties During the Spanish Inquisition.

Monk to monk: 'Can you take over? I have to tinkle.'

'What are you, some kind of religious nut?'

'Brilliant - cold porridge and stale bread again!'

"I've switched from self-flagellation to a high-fiber diet."

The Nutmeg-Grater