Monastic Tradition Lover Gifts

Everyone knew it was a hideous style, but nothing was ever said.

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

Trappist Monk Discord

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

Folk Wedding

Monks in monastry dancing, "They're high on apostasy again."

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

"Tia Carmen, I have a killer test tomorrow. Can you help?"

Maypole

"So, are you predicting an early spring?"

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

'Am I glad to be back - austerity's gone mad out there!'

Dear Diary

It's a tradition. On hole number 1 in the first round of the season, Ernie always says that's the best shot I've hit this year!

"Milton Woolburg, founder of traditions, legends, and general flimlam."

"Straighten up that tonsure."

Shavuot - Like!

Time for Tea

Queen reigning.

Happy Hogmanay!

"For simplicity, we call this one Ding and that one Dong."

First Marriage.

Two friars ringing bells

It's a mobile, wireless internet device

'I want a traditional church wedding but Sam prefers something trendy. Can we compromise and do it bunji-jumping from the steeple?'

'Not ANOTHER pub boarded up!'

"We don't make toys any more. I send the elves to buy them in China."

"We had this last year."

"Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, which may involve an occasional hot=dog-eating contest."

'I totally forgot what I was looking for.'

'4th Sunday before Easter... and 5th before my holiday!'

"You've got a vow of silence? How interesting! Tell me all about that!"

"The Convent of the Immaculate Heart Brewery"

'Get Offa My Lawn!'