Monarch Gifts

Our succession plan is we don't talk about it!

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

Prince Philip

'Don't think of it as a problem ??" think of it as an opportunity.'

"On the one hand, I know I could make more money if I left public service for the private sector, but, on the other hand, I couldn't chop off heads."

"This gives my confidence a real boost."

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

"You should know better than to give a speech in the morning before you've had your coffee."

'You can read, right? -- I want you to check this thing for loopholes.'

'Then, just so the masses won't revolt, we'll call it a working vacation.'

'Are you crazy? Kings can't take sabbaticals!'

'Dad, have you ever thought about retiring and going in for volunteer work?'

'He abolished the death penalty - He decided that punitive tax rates were more efficient.'

'How fast can you make me literate? -- I want to rewrite history.'

'This isn't about me, it's about you.'

"Not exactly - He believes that the ends justify BEING mean."

'Try to see things from my point of view.'

"My majesty!"

"Refresh my memory - Was I born great, or did they thrust greatness upon me?"

'Let's see.... oh, dang! - 'Conquer Bosnia-Herzegovina'!'

'You can't resolve every disagreement by saying, 'off with your head!''

'I know it seems like a war, but it's actually an all-out struggle for peace!'

'...You can't say 'on with his head' after you've said 'off with his head'.'

'You can read, right? -- I want you to check this thing for loopholes.'

'My new years resolution is to be less imperious.'

"We lost another battle? Why does this keep happening?"

'Yes, this is us speaking.'

"Gentlemen, the fact that all my horses and all my men couldn't put Humpty together again simply proves to me that I must have more horses and more men."

'Angry mob, not flash mob, Your Highness,'

'Somebody posted his hidden agendas on the Internet.'

"Things have been quiet for some time in your line of work."

'Sorry, dear, but we knew this job was dangerous when we took it.'

"Just the usual stuff - 17 bills and half a dozen death threats."

"'An embarassment of riches.' Where did we learn this expression?"

"I think that being insanely wealthy has actually brought us closer together."