Modesty Gifts

'Somewhere where men won't be undressing me with their eyes!'

'Call me anti-social if you want. The pants stay on.'

'I can't take off my clothes - I'm Missouri Synod Lutheran!'

"Eve, how come every leaf has fallen except yours?"

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

Drive-thru Church

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

"Remember, it's Boy, Girl, LGBT, Boy, Girl, LG . . ."

"It's not art, really - just something I pulled out of my butt."

Why not get God's fax number, and just fax him my prayer?

'I'm eating less and drinking less, yet I'm still merry!'

"He's so ostentatious about how un-ostentatious he is."

"If we're doing such a good job of keeping the devil away, how come we have so many of these infernal machines around here?"

Group showers. Just one of the reasons few golfers take up football.

'Life on the farm used to be so... innocent. What's happened to us?'

Church Sign Asks If You Are Prepared for Digital Conversion.

'I'm gifted but I hide it well.'

'Sure I do bad things, but I do them in moderation.'

'Do you think the legal profession is modern and forward-thinking, Sir?'

'I prefer 'Baby Boomer' over 'Senior Citizen'.'

"I am wearing the new bikini you saw...unfortunately, my father saw it too, and made me wear this over it!"

There is no clear line in the salon world.

"Finally a bit of privacy."

"Oh, come on. Live a little. It's liberating."

"More like 95% off!"

"And remember, the phone goes to the left of the entree fork."

Wishing Well - Change given.

You can't come out...

Ladies using thier cage crinolines as bathing machines

"Please excuse Steve...he hates pretentiousness!"

"A lot of people say that absence is my best feature."

True Modesty.