Modern Work Life Observer Gifts

The giggle economy

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

"You're not the same pupa you were when we first met."

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

'I give this one about three months...'

Terry had a computer bug.

"Do we always have to work through lunch?"

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

St. Elmo's fired.

"Of course, the actual honey is all made overseas."

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

You're right, boss, there may be too much idle chit-chat, but let me talk it over with my friends.

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

'My salary increase got a few oo-hs.. but no ah-hs..'

You trip on it, you buy it.

"Beats me how pregnancy has survived into the modern era. There's no reception desk, product guarantee nor customer service department!"

"Remember that requirement that you work without supervision? Forget it."

"No, it's not codependency. The neediness is just in one direction."

Down on Bourbon Street...

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

Thanks, I'd like to accept the job, but what is the salary? Sorry, it's against company policy to disclose that!

"I need a more interactive you."

"He was much more effective in the field."

'Put simply, we need our website to tell consumers all about our company without really telling them anything about our company,'

"Photo safaris are not what they used to be: They seem more interested in taking selfies than photos of us these days..."

"Closing averages on the human scene were mixed today. Brotherly love was down two points, while enlightened self-interest gained a half. Vanity showed no movement, and guarded optimism slipped a point in sluggish trading. Over all, the status quo remained unchanged."

"And the tech guy said not to worry if I lost my phone. There's an app for that..."

Jenkins! Why is it everything in this office is voice-activated except you?

"I've got your letter in front of me now, sir."