Modern Shipping Observer Gifts

"I knew those drones were bad news..."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

The aliens froze, gripped by a primal fear. This time there would be no abduction.

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"Are we there yet?"

Olly really didn't know his arse from his elbow.

Titanic: How's my steering.

"Why does this curious plant of his always make me feel gigantic?"

"You may enjoy swimming with the dolphins, Howard, but do they enjoy swimming with you?"

'You've got to help my son, Doctor — he's joined a cult that crawls up on beaches!'

"How do you feel about working a four-day week?"

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

'Your secondhand smoke is giving the hermit crab a hacking cough!'

"Dad! I can't believe we come to the beach and you set up all the way out here! I can barely see the ocean...we're so far from the wa..."

'Well for crying out loud, why didn't you do that when I asked you?!!'

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

Squirrel Tapping On Window Demanding Food.

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

Fish tank filled with sardines.

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

"I guess we'll know ol' Mr. Willis is dead when the Amazon packages stop arriving."

"Next year, I'm pleasuring myself."

Thru The Eyes Of A Lifeguard.

"Look at that ant farm! I love the ants' little overalls!

Evolution into a pair of sandals.

"Oh, for crying out loud, Lou... just go in the water!"

"Well, it is a good property. The price is low because it is harder to negotiate due to its S-bend configuration."

Fish Feeding Frenzy

"At the end of the day it's just a sunset."

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

"We used to be cooler."