Modern Marveller Gifts

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Child on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

"Sorry, dear... I don't have a pumpkin spiced flat white chai latte. I just have this one..."

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

"It's wonderful, darling. It really says Manhattan."

"Which one's yours?"

"Before we made the leap to cyberspace, our stockholders made us promise we'd maintain a traditional street presence, too!"

Spider boy

'I'm not convinced you need tranquillizers to switch phone provider.'

Last Reception for 200 Miles.

"Is it just me, or is it humid up here?"

"By the time we can marry in all fifty states, we'll probably be divorced."

Free WiFi

'Well, if they don't go chuff chuff anymore. . . how do they go?'

"I suppose every girl dreams of someday getting a big divorce settlement."

"Woulda looked cool with a beer in his hand, though." Michelangelo's cousin, Michelobelo

Modern Charm

'The knee brace I prescribed, you put on over your head.'

"Try and stop me if you’ve heard this one before …"

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

Ye Haul.

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

Baggage Horse

"Susanna Explaining Broadband to the Elders."

"Nice moat."

Less is less

"He must be really serious to send you something a permanent as an email."

"Do you take this person for better or worse, rich or poor, in sickness even with a high co-pay?"

What do you want in a lipstick Chocolate flavouring, cellulite burning enzymes and an alcohol content of 40