Modern Homeowner Gifts

"I think our 'Smart TV' might have overheard us..."

"The microwave is smart, but the refrigerator is woke."

'Blooming modern houses.'

"Is it a big deal if I forgot to plug in the sump pump in our basement back home?"

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

Dog Walking Services

Painting by the numbers for adults

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Snoopy with Laptop

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

Jack and Ina build their dream house.

"You haven't enjoyed the Yule log till you've enjoyed it in high def."

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

"Would you like to sleep through the film or the variety show?"

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

Happiness is spending late summer afternoon on a buying binge at the iPhone app store.

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

"One silo is for grain, the other is for the money we save on gas."

'For Sale by Neighbor'

"I wonder what our self-cooking kitchen has for us today."

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

"Donald, the dog wants to get back in."

"The pH level seems a little off."

Having installed a hydraulically operated wall in their 25-year-old's bedroom...

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

Gypsy curses didn't seem so threatening after the Mummy went into the peg business.

'What a day! - the computer broke down, and I had to cook manually!'

'The Hunt family have solved the problem of the fire ants.'

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

Living together, couple in love.