Modern Hermit Gifts

"Honey, I'm home."

"You can just leave it on that crag, thanks."

My annual treecation: A week away from work, sitting beneath a tree with a twist. My gadgets have run low on power, my mini portable generator has died. So not it's just me and you, tree. Just the two of us. True escape from the world. The boredom is destroying my soul. He won't last half-minute.

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

'You can't take away my life, I haven't had one yet.'

You come down now, Everett. The children have grown up and left.

Hiding From Social Media

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

Cellphone Islands

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

Connected to Technology.

"Yes, I'm alone."

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

OM, SWEET OM

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

Bearded old man atop mountain.

"That's the worst case of Cabin Fever that I've ever seen. Luckily, spring is right around the corner."

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

'Oh wise one - what is the secret to long life?'

"Free why-fi.”

"The meaning of life! Have you tried Googling it?"

'Wow! - Your diary is even more boring than MY diary!'

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

'My son is studying communications in college. He never writes, calls, texts, or emails his parents.'

Unsocial Networking.

Buy one enlightenment get one free.

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

Woman meets up with guru: 'Oh, there you are, honey. Dinner's getting cold.'

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'