Hermit Gifts

Bearded old man atop mountain.

'Yes, I can tell you the meaning of life, but then I would have to kill you.'

'If suffering is good for the soul, why the cushion?'

'The meaning of life? I dunno, I only come up here to get a decent mobile connection.'

Meditation Munchies

'Enlightenment does that to some people.'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'He's at the pinnacle, but not at the pinnacle of his PROFESSION.'

'For you, 'The Meaning of Life' will end, if you don't scram!'

'I won't discuss the secret sauce...'

'Hey! - Do I have to separate you two?'

Truth seeker seeking knowledge sees different levels of gurus.

'Excuse me -- did you happen to noticed which mountain I fell off of?'

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

Woman meets up with guru: 'Oh, there you are, honey. Dinner's getting cold.'

'Oh wise one - what is the secret to long life?'

'I've yinned and I've yanged. It's close, but yin is better.'

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

'What do you mean, you hear a burglar downstairs?'

'No matter where you go, people somehow find you.'

"I can't tell from this far away, but he's either enlightened or dead."

"Well, when we first came here, this was Tibet, but I haven't paid much attention to politics lately."

"It gets a tad crowded in winter when I share the cave with 100s of hibernating snakes."

"Live your life devoid of attachments."

"That's it? I've been waiting up here for 26 years for the meaning of life...and that's it?"

"Actually, I just came up here to get away from leading economic indicators."

I don't know about you, but all this social distancing is beginning to get to me.

"Thank God! Show me the path down. I've been stuck here 15 years."

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

Estate sale.

"Seriously?"

"Free why-fi.”

"Do you realize you snore when you meditate?"

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"