Hermit Lifestyle Gifts

"Whatever you do in there all day is fine with me, so long as it's not writing a memoir."

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

"Yes, I'm alone."

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

OM, SWEET OM

Bearded old man atop mountain.

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

'Oh wise one - what is the secret to long life?'

'Wow! - Your diary is even more boring than MY diary!'

"Free why-fi.”

"Like you, I'm a bit of a glutton, but I need to monitor my food intake otherwise I could be too heavy to fly..."

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'

Buy one enlightenment get one free.

Woman meets up with guru: 'Oh, there you are, honey. Dinner's getting cold.'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

'Enlightenment does that to some people.'

'He's at the pinnacle, but not at the pinnacle of his PROFESSION.'

'Hey! - Do I have to separate you two?'

"Master, I'm looking for enlightenment!"

"Actually, I just came up here to get away from leading economic indicators."

'Government regulations are simple and explicit - ONE guru to a mountain top!'

'It's a good thing everything is illusory - My keister hurts like crazy!'