Hermit Lifestyle Lover Gifts

"I miss avoiding people."

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

"I hope you realize this is bad Feng Shui!"

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Yes, I'm alone."

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

'Extinct? Good heavens no. I'm vegan for God's sake.'

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

" Actually, Dear, I said I wanted to start eating 'all natural, not 'au naturel'!"

Excess Baggage: Forcing your homebody spouse to accompany you on a business trip is generally not a great idea.

It's true what they say: Life at the top can be lonely...

"Accounting has really changed you, Razor-Face."

'Thank goodness, the publishers rejected my self help book.'

"You can just leave it on that crag, thanks."

Hiding From Social Media

"He's living his life in a vacuum."

"There's apparently another one of those rescue ships coming to take us back to civilisation. . . quick, let's hide!"

'No matter where you go, people somehow find you.'

'I'm self isolating, you idiot!'

'I told you that nobody would show up.'

"I haven't seen you in ages - have you not been hiding under a rock?"

And the great thing is...our kids love remote learning!

'I'm a hermit crab and like it this way, so no, I don't want to join any social network!'

'Have you got the time?'

"Burton, Fenton and Hacwood. Sorry, Mr. Hackwood is away, taking a 'gap' year on top of a mountain."

You come down now, Everett. The children have grown up and left.

"Not more 'me time'?"

"There are easier ways to get time to yourself, Ed."

'Welcome to St Judes Summer Fayre' full of cannabis related items

"I recommend self-isolation."