Hermit Enthusiasts Gifts

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

"My advice would be to minimise all social contact."

'I told you that nobody would show up.'

"Don't ask me, I never get off this darn mountain!"

"There's apparently another one of those rescue ships coming to take us back to civilisation. . . quick, let's hide!"

"I recommend self-isolation."

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Yes, I'm alone."

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

OM, SWEET OM

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

Bearded old man atop mountain.

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

"Free why-fi.”

'Oh wise one - what is the secret to long life?'

'Wow! - Your diary is even more boring than MY diary!'

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

Buy one enlightenment get one free.

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"

Woman meets up with guru: 'Oh, there you are, honey. Dinner's getting cold.'

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

'He's at the pinnacle, but not at the pinnacle of his PROFESSION.'

'Hey! - Do I have to separate you two?'

Excess Baggage: Forcing your homebody spouse to accompany you on a business trip is generally not a great idea.

'Enlightenment does that to some people.'

"Actually, I just came up here to get away from leading economic indicators."

'It's a good thing everything is illusory - My keister hurts like crazy!'

"Master, I'm looking for enlightenment!"