Hermit Life Appreciator Gifts

'I've stopped blogging myself: Frankly, the life of a Hermit Crab is not that exciting...'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Yes, I'm alone."

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

"That was before I found this amazing new way to earn $$$ working from home."

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

"Do you see the person who stole your home from you in the courtroom today?"

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

"My parents are nice, school's going well, and I'm basically a good kid. Unfortunately, there's no money or fame in being normal."

Excess Baggage: Forcing your homebody spouse to accompany you on a business trip is generally not a great idea.

Life is just four letters...

'Thank goodness, the publishers rejected my self help book.'

"He's living his life in a vacuum."

"You can just leave it on that crag, thanks."

'I'm self isolating, you idiot!'

'No matter where you go, people somehow find you.'

'I told you that nobody would show up.'

"We've been here forty years - When do we get our golden parachutes?"

"There's apparently another one of those rescue ships coming to take us back to civilisation. . . quick, let's hide!"

"It gets a tad crowded in winter when I share the cave with 100s of hibernating snakes."

Blissful Acres - An Ignorant Community

The singular joy of living with a person who routinely glimpses the miraculous in the mundane.

"I haven't seen you in ages - have you not been hiding under a rock?"

There's no cure for birth and death, so you may as well enjoy the interval!

And the great thing is...our kids love remote learning!

"There are easier ways to get time to yourself, Ed."

'I'm a hermit crab and like it this way, so no, I don't want to join any social network!'

"I recommend self-isolation."

'Have you got the time?'

"Not more 'me time'?"

"Burton, Fenton and Hacwood. Sorry, Mr. Hackwood is away, taking a 'gap' year on top of a mountain."