Modern Groomer Gifts

"I'm glad I got a haircut. The barber found three set of headphones lost in my long hair that I've been looking for."

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

"You may now kiss the bride..."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

Braiding a Horse's Tail

Brian was very proud of his dog.

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"Wow. . . what's that?!"

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

Lesser known greek gods,

Bathing the dog

Dog lover

'He does.'

"Absolutely not!"

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

"Who told the quartet to play 'Highway to Hell'?"

'It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.'

Emergency Hipster Beard

"Too much concealer?"