Modern-day Storytellers Gifts

'You're telling me a bunch of kids left town with a guy named the Pied Piper? Why didn't they just follow him on Twitter?'

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

Pastries and Candy

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

Home Sweet Home

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

'Are we there yet?'

Two Generations of Readers

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'He was a great writer'

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

Man takes picutre of other man holding up huge worm at Bait Shop.

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

"We're not really fighting, mom. We just need a little drama for our YouTube channel. Subscribers equal money."

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

I just made up that part. It should really throw people for a loop if they find this place thousands of years from now!

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

Jorge Luis Borges

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

"Ever since the layoffs, I feel like we've been doing the work of twenty clowns."

'Tell me about your gap year, Mr, Van Winkle,'

"Honestly, I thought you were a metaphor."

How James and John became known as "Sons of Thunder".

Having moved to a tablet, the farmer's wife was done with mice. . .

'New hope for dysfunctional couples: Read aloud the complete works of Trollope.'

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

BOOKS ON VIDEO/BOOKS ON TAPE/READ YOUR OWN.