Modern-day Storytellers Pillows

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

Pastries and Candy

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

'Are we there yet?'

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

Two Generations of Readers

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'He was a great writer'

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

Man takes picutre of other man holding up huge worm at Bait Shop.

Jorge Luis Borges

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

"Ever since the layoffs, I feel like we've been doing the work of twenty clowns."

"Honestly, I thought you were a metaphor."

'New hope for dysfunctional couples: Read aloud the complete works of Trollope.'

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

'Tell me about your gap year, Mr, Van Winkle,'

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

BOOKS ON VIDEO/BOOKS ON TAPE/READ YOUR OWN.

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

Having moved to a tablet, the farmer's wife was done with mice. . .

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'