Modem Whisperer Gifts

'Wilson, I'll need you to make high pitched screeching noises until I get this modem working properly.'

Jack of all trades

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

Fixing the Computer.

Man and Machine snoozing

Computer help.

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

'Interactive TV news.'

"Can you help me? I'm having a little trouble working the shredder."

'Oh great, a machine with an attitude.'

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

Cellular Plan

"Go! Go! Go! Go!" The hot video game where you're a peacemaker who disarms everyone in sight and sells them on the virtues of nonviolent communication.

'He's had too much exposure to wi-fi.'

"I keep getting the feeling I’m being watched."

Office full of computers and wires.

"You got my text... but did you get my subtext?"

Factory foreman says: 'Sometimes the machines here do try to take over the world. Last week the coffee maker even had a go.'

Soft Speaker, Loud Speaker, Deafening Speaker

Sad looking computer with plasters and a black eye

"How's the computer analysis going?"

'Good morning, This is receptionist Susan, portal to the boss.'

'If I need emergency assistance with this program, do I type 911?'

"Your sermon had everyone at rapt attention. Good move cutting the church WiFi."

"With Gloria, it's in one ear and out the mouth."

Struggling with unwilling computers.

"I have a real love/hate relationship with email."

Nature rebels against the machine

"I always get the feeling it's holding something back."