Modeling Agent Gifts

A sign that the catwalk models are getting too thin.

Seventeen-year-old fashion model.

"Remember babes, this business is all about beauty and perfection."

Scientific Models Auditions

The Anti-Agent

That may well be how the catalk models do it, but I still think you look like a three legged horse in a field of cowpats!

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

Meet Santa's entourage

That every day look.

'Mon Dieu! This year, your collection is really daring, mon cher Karl!'

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

'Are you done yet?'

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...

'They're only interested in computer generated mammoths.' (Theatrical Agent).

Snow White and her Seven people.

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

THEATRICAL AGENCY, 'We have an opening to do some commercials - How'd you like to be the LEAST interesting man in the world?'

"You're looking at the next Bob Dylan."

Mammoth Posing

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

Directors chairs on movie set with Model, Actress, and Whatever on them

'Michelle's Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms'

'... And that's where I'm seeking planning permission to build a secret uranium enrichment plant...'

'Therapy in L.A.'

Scientists building a tower

'Honestly Gwen, do you really think that guys are going to notice your heels tonight?'