Mixed Breeds Gifts

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

I love you. You're my everything. Mixed Message Arts.

"Yeah well, now that we're married, he's not making any effort: he hasn't been to a grooming appointment in months!"

"He's a Crocodoodle."

'It's a bloody-cross-breed.'

Couple with lots of kids. Woman says: 'This is our daughter, my son from my first marriage, John's daughter from his second marriage, and I've no idea who the one on the end is.'

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."

Chickenspox

'I don't know whether we should call the world pres or keep quiet?'

'He's half sheepdog and half rottweiler... first he rounds 'em up and then he eats 'em!'

'Yes, we're trying to re-introduce some of the more traditional breeds.'

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

'Yesterday her kids and my kids started beating up our kids.'

"Careful with Number Three. I hear she's a tough one to please."

"No! Your dukes...Put up your dukes!"

'He's a mixed breed.'

"I'll clean my room when I want. I don't have to listen to you. You're just my step ladder."

'You know, I think I'm in the wrong nest.'

"He's a Prince Charles Spaniel."

"I'm tripping over bernedoodles, labradoodles, goldendoodles, schnoodles and cockapoos, ...and you want me to somehow believe you're not sleeping around?"

He used to be a cat person, but he went over to the "bark side."

"My kid form my first marriage? I thought he was YOUR kid from your first marriage."

'And do you, Randall, take Linda and her cat that doesn't like you?'

"What about instead of your stepdad, you just think of me as a 'gritty reboot'."

UFC on steroids...

"As a blended family, we've learned to set limits. I limit myself to margaritas and he limits himself to mojitos."

"I'm trying to make milk out of wool."

"I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was young."

"Thanks, Mom. Thanks, Kevin. I had a very nice time."

"Mom was a zebra, but Dad was an ass."

"His parents were pretty open-minded, romantically speaking."

"Just leave the hat on and maybe my parents won't notice."

"Like I said... he's a boxer."

"I know you don't like Democrats, Father, but Willis is a me-too Democrat."