Misophonia Sufferers Gifts

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

A Fairytale Update

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

Radiator jazz player

See, Catty-O? I told you dinner was included with admission.

Six jazz instruments.

'I'm sure I could lie on my back waving my feet in the air if I could play the saxophone.'

Hollywood producer.

Double Saxophone

In case of funky emergency, break glass

'That was Charlie Parker's 'Ornithology.' I threw in a flat nine in bar 16 and a tritone substitution in bar 22. Who noticed that? Hands up if you noticed!'

Saxophonist playing on the map of Cornwall.

"No, son. Let him finish."

Red hot little combo

"This should be cozy. Just let me know if you need an extra sousaphone."

'I'm not sure if he plays that loud because he has a good set of lungs or if it's a mean streak in him.'

"Damn it, Hopkins, didn't you get yesterday's memo?"

'...and on Bass...'

Musical Pipe

A saxophone player reads music that says, 'Dade, dade, dade, dade, dade, deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee' with the eeeeeeees falling off the music stand onto the floor.

Despite some initial reservations, the knights were often grateful for Guinevere's presence at the Round Table.

"She's always like this at this time of the month!"

Annoying xylophone solicitors.

'Not only did I fix the leak, but when you run the hot water it plays 'Harlem Nocturne'.'

Ha! Musical fruit my patootie...

Man playing bum-note.

Communication

The Ignored Busker

'Goodness me, Graham! I didn't think you had musical bone in your body!'

Man trying to catch a saxophonist with butterfly wings.

"This is a lovely three bedroom detached property, with close proximity to Heathrow and the M25!"

A fat saxophonist on the beach wearing a rubber ring.

"Dad hasn't been the same since he went back to school."

Shouting

"And for that pain deep down in your soul, I'm going to prescribe the saxophone."