Mischievous Moments Admirer Pillows

"You can perform a satanic ritual in the poultry department when you're older."

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

"I know I said my dog had no teeth, mister- but that's not my dog!"

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"Koalas when no one's looking"

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"Cat-astrophic Trifecta" "I pooped in Mona's Jimmy Choo handbag." "I knocked over grampa's ashes." "I buried a Barbie in the litter box."

Malfunctioning geyser

'A penny saved is another thing for you to knock off the dresser.'

There's a lot of crying out there! Looks like we were gnawing on the internet cable...

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

"I didn't say he was 'house broken' I said he was a 'house breaker'"

Misery lit...

Husband Descending a Staircase After Tripping on his Wife's Shoes

Dog with chew toy.

Children playing in a library

"Violets are blue Roses are red Enjoy the dead mouse I hid in your bed"

"Do you know why we pulled you over today, sir?"

'Moron.'

Law Books

'It's finished, my masterpiece - wait...'

'Cut it out!'

"When I run away, put my picture on t-shirts instead of milk cartons."

'This thing between us two is not going to work...you get the picture?'

'Tsk, the garden's full of the dog's mess again...'

'We bought it as a bonsai tree!'

"Do you have any idea what you've done?"

'Ok, who threw that?'

Man getting dressed captures small child in the material,

"What have you done with her this time?"

'Moral of the story? Oh, son, we don't have those.'

'Just think of it as graphic design, Mom.'

'A large hole has appeared in the wall of the nudist camp - Police are looking into it.'

"Tuna and chicken bone breakfast smoothie. We were going to surprise you."