Mischievous Moments Fan Pillows

"Her name's Snuggles."

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

Recombinant DNA Lab. I'm crossing a pine tree, pumpkin and bunny --- You can use it for three holidays!

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

Misery lit...

Law Books

'It's finished, my masterpiece - wait...'

'Cut it out!'

'We bought it as a bonsai tree!'

'I didn't hear about any oil spill on the news!'

"If you want soil moved around, I say why wait for erosion."

'Just think of it as graphic design, Mom.'

"He looks so peaceful when he's asleep."

"Tuna and chicken bone breakfast smoothie. We were going to surprise you."

'A large hole has appeared in the wall of the nudist camp - Police are looking into it.'

'Moral of the story? Oh, son, we don't have those.'

'They say that six is the new four.'

Man getting dressed captures small child in the material,

'The bath didn't work.'

'Sorry God, I think you got the wrong guy, I like sex, drugs and rock and roll.'

"Airplane Mode doesn't work. I threw your phone out the window and it didn't fly."

'I told you not to argue with the ref, Dewey.'

'Maybe she has allergies.'

"I know I said my dog had no teeth, mister- but that's not my dog!"

Mouse with Christmas Cake

'They're Home!!!... HA-HA-HA... you are soooo busted!'

"Well, I guess that's the last time the Cullings ever invite us over!"

"You can perform a satanic ritual in the poultry department when you're older."

'I can't believe this - You let a MOUSE stare you down?'

'Psst - we're looking for material that's totally inappropriate for our age. Can you help us out?'

I don't mind giving Fido a bath. It's cleaning up afterwards that kills me!

Chameleon thief.

"Look. Jerome. Unless you want me to crap on the bed I'd suggest you practice your sand wedge outside."

"That's my grandfather chasing cars and biting mailmen. He lived life off-the-leash."

'I wish my husband was really hot.'