Mischievous Marketer Gifts

"Alternatively we could make them all sexy."

'You'll 'ave a lovely Christmas in ere, son. Just don't go too near the mistletoe.'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

Pinocchio's nose used by cat as a scratching post

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

"That's our new church mascot."

Floss Street Vendor

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

Child selling cold lemonade in the winter

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

Pants Uglifier!

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

Doomsday marketing

'...hmm ...I predict an upturn in profits this year.'

"Psst! I got mantras. You need a mantra? Mantras right here..."

Sun Dried Ice Cubes

'Now there goes a good Salesman...!'

Visit Santa today...sponsored by Acme Razor Company

'Nice of them to invite us to a dance.'

Killing Santa

"Childbirth just isn't keeping pace with modern marketing. We still don't come with a manufacturing warranty.

'Mandy is playing cupid again!'

'It's finished, my masterpiece - wait...'

'Cut it out!'

'We bought it as a bonsai tree!'

"Check this out! My ew app imitates the sound of the door bell and makes the dog go berserk."

Johnny Appleseed's less popular brother, Joey Kiwi.

"See? You don't need fancy window displays to attract attention...just get some police tape!"

Man in puzzle shop looks at staff picks which are individual puzzle pieces.

Advertising meets cryptozoology...

'He brings a bizarrely different perspective to our marketing.'

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

Free Hamster, "That's novel, getting a free hamster with every meal."

'How many times have I told you not to play with matches?'

I shall not insult my stupid, fat, idiotic, ugly, lousy teacher...