Minnesota Timberwolves Fan Gifts

Ricky Rubio

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

E-Baying @ The Moon

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."

'Harvey, did you notice what a beautiful full moon we have tonight?'

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

"Frank, I want you to try antidepressants."

'I'll get back to you when I'm myself, Eddie.'

"Do I have to go out again!?"

"Which one is yours?"

"It's a full moon somewhere."

"I'm referring you to an old gypsy woman."

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

'Dad, this is so cool: Next month is a Blue Moon month, with two full moons instead of one!'

A were-cow.

'The Werewolf Diet? It's great: you can eat anything you want, but only during the full moon.'

Little pig #2 makes himself a less desireable meal.

'How come this sheep tastes like sugar?'

The Morrison brothers took dressing as woodchucks to the extreme.'

"There's no need to howl at every moon we pass by."

'It's a reinterpretation of the 'Christmas Carol'...but with a 'Vampire vs Werewolf' contemporary take on the story.'

"Let's raise it as one of our pack. That way we can be sure it grows up to be a fierce environmentalist."

WEREWOLF WEARING DOG CONE

Due to higher-than-usual caller volume, your wait-time is nine minutes. That's over an hour in wolverine minutes.

"But aside from the lycanthropy, things have been pretty O.K."

"Ok, it got weird while you were a wolf."

"What starts with a full moon, ends with a full moon.

'But Sweety, you have to learn how to tell the time: As a wolf, you'll often be asked...'

"It's the same old story, a few rotten werewolves and we all get a bad name. Go on, throw the ball.."

'I'm warning you, don't come any closer! I'm fully charged with static electricity!'

The Wolfman's Brother

'When the curse is upon Dave he's never sure whether to use the bathroom or the garden.'