Mini Bartender Gifts

'Hi, Dad! We were going to set up the lemonade stand you suggested, but then Jamie got an even better idea!'

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

SALE

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

'He said I have no cavities and that my breath knocked his socks off.'

'At first I was grounded, but my lawyer was able to plea bargain it down to 30 minutes in the Time Out Chair.'

A young positivist.

"It failed the stress test."

"I wish he'd actually play with his toy hospital, rather than just making strike placards."

"I don't have time for piggy banks. Can't I just buy an ATM?"

"Face it -- you resent me for the exploring in depth a world that you take for granted."

'This low-alcohol beer doesn't taste bad with a scotch in it.'

Hotel mini-bar.

Make good decisions!

"I can't wait until we're older so we can get into the cannabis industry. At least then we can make a difference in people's lives."

'I brought my mini bar with me.'

"Will that be for here or to go?"

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

Essentials

"Get with it, darling, Wednesday is the new Friday."

Actually, I'm not aware that it's a constitutional right to get an allowance...

"The sign of the sun has been a big influence on his local life, it's his local pub."

hey good lookin ( 'six summers' card range idea)

"I'm exhausted. Get your own damn tea."

House Party Punch

"Tomorrow night let's switch back to gin."

'Michael, use your words. What do you say when someone takes your truck?'

"Sure I've heard of inflation. I've also heard of wage concessions."

"Honey, I'll be downstairs in the man cave FaceTiming my bartender."

'Me, I'm making my pocket money by selling my dad's old shoes as lucky charms...'

'well, that proves that. Mom's phone doesn't have a 'Float' app.'

'What did you learn in Science class today?'