Home Bartender Gifts

'This low-alcohol beer doesn't taste bad with a scotch in it.'

Essentials

"Get with it, darling, Wednesday is the new Friday."

House Party Punch

James Bond in a Snow Globe

A Good Batch.

"Actually, make that a double cream."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

Yoga for Alcoholics

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"Now I really hate poetry."

'No ice.'

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

We'll have Manhattans...

"The spoon, he ran away with the goddam spoon."

You got that beer that the monks make, didn't you?

Join me in a Martini?

Mount Olympus Brewery. Those might be dangerous to open. They're Pandora's Bocks.

'No standing while room is in motion.'

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

"I think I speak for my entire generation when I say, 'Yes, I will have another drink.' "